About Prejudice and Judgement
“You’re gonna love this one!” my husband told me in the car, while he put on one of the songs from his new playlist. The title appeared: “Disturbed – The Sound of Silence”. Now I actually do love “The Sound of Silence” by Simon and Garfunkel. But looking at the dashboard of the car, I had my doubts about this version. My husband’s new playlist included songs that I tolerated, maybe even liked when I was a teenager (Rammstein, Nightwish, Korn… hell, I sometimes even listened to Children of Bodom… strange times.) but they give me the chills now. And not in a good way…
So I was of course waiting for the head banging to come. Also, because my husband was holding up his finger, like “it’s almost starting for real” and I couldn’t decide if he was messing with me or actually meant it. But there was no head banging. Only a beautiful orchestra and a strong, clear baritone of a man. I got goosebumps listening to it.
My husband was right (but don’t tell him ;), I loved it. And it cleared on me, how my prejudice almost kept me from getting to know this song. It also got me to think, what I’ve been missing out on because of my assumptions. Sports, hobbies, lifestyles, techniques that I look at and say “I don’t think that’s for me”. Even without ever trying. Sadly, I could name quite a few.
So here’s a fun thing to do for the week: the practice that I’ve developed to question my own prejudices:
- Choose something that you actively want to grow in: your parenting, hobby, job, spirituality, anything where you feel stuck, but really want to move on.
- Look at the techniques, methods or systems that you’ve found before, but dismissed without trying.
- Now I bet you know tons of why-nots. I always come up with those easily in every new opportunity. (Anyone suffering from this too?) “I can’t do X, because of Y.”
“I can’t pick up swimming again, the schedule of the swimming pool is ridiculous!”
“I can’t possibly try x diet, I don’t have so much time/money.”
“I can’t start painting again, I have kids to feed, dress, play with, carpool, etc!”
You get the point. Now note these why-nots. Either write them down or just mentally make a note of them.
- After you noted your why-nots, I challenge you to find some reasons for why you should give those a try. Come up with at least 5 points for why you could and should give it a try.
Now, you could leave it there, it’s already a great start. But for the advanced version, try to actually get into action. Do something. Give it a try and see if you were right about it not being a fit.
You might find that you were indeed right. It’s not a fit. Or not a total fit, meaning that you can keep parts of the system and use those to get you where you want to be. You’ll gain experience in any case.
Let me know how it goes!